What Does Not Constitute as Love

Love is what makes the world go round. It’s such a cliché phrase but it couldn’t be farther from the truth. Genuine selfless love can change the lives of people everywhere in the world.

Unfortunately, our self-centered and materialistic society might give us false impressions of what does and doesn’t constitute as love.

I’ve made mistakes in thinking that certain actions or words that came out of a guy’s mouth was of genuine interest or love, and I’ve learned from that, which has helped me to navigate my current relationship with my boyfriend of almost 2 years.

If you’re single, dating, engaged or married, it’s vital to know which actions and words are done out of genuine true love and which are masking as love but really isn’t.

1. Kissing

I’m sorry ladies and gents, but just because someone initiated a kiss or passionately kissed you back doesn’t mean that they love you. Kissing is a way to express your love for someone, but it does not equate to true love.

In order to distinguish kissing done as an act of expressing love from kissing done as a way to get you to comply to doing something or just to hook-up, you should look at the context of the relationship.

How long have you been together for? Do you have a solid friendship? Do their actions line up with their words?

2. Sex

Sex is exactly like kissing except it takes it one or two steps further. You may believe that you can have sex without getting emotionally attached to the person you had it with.

But physically, having sex releases the bonding hormone oxytocin and it will come with a lot of deceiving feelings sooner or later.

My personal beliefs on sex is that it’s wise to wait until after you’ve gotten married, because marriage is permanent and it is binding.

Having premarital sex does not make you a bad or immoral person, but because it is so much more than the physical, it’s important to make the more wise decision.

3. Gifts

I love receiving gifts. I mean, who doesn’t? But they do not constitute as love. It really is all about their intentions. There are many people who shower others with gifts so they can get something they want but couldn’t get in the first place.

Gifts are awesome and can definitely be an expression of love. But do not automatically assume that just because someone bought you dinner or bought you expensive gifts that they love you to the fullest.

If they’ve given you one or two gifts, there’s no reason to be suspicious, but when you’re being showered with them one after another for no reason, stay cautious.

4. Compliments

As a woman, it’s awesome to get compliments from people, but especially from my boyfriend because it shows that he appreciates and acknowledges me for who I am. But I know that compliments alone does not constitute as love.

If your love language is words of affirmation, compliments may get you into thinking that receiving them from someone constitutes as love.

But tread carefully and consider the context of your relationship before choosing to believe or think that they did it out of love.

Featured Image: iStock

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